


Reach

by Genista



Category: DARLING In The FRANXX (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Romance, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-05-05
Packaged: 2020-01-13 17:41:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 10,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18473878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Genista/pseuds/Genista
Summary: Just a friends to lovers story. A bit of family drama.





	1. Chapter 1

The new coffee shop in town was packed full that evening, she had never been more aware how lacking in height she was than in that moment as Kokoro stood on tiptoes, trying to make the most of her five feet, four inches, attempting to locate her friends. No good, Kokoro blew a sharp breath ruffling her ash blonde bangs, she couldn’t see anything beyond the wall of people except the occasional guy who was a head taller than the rest. 

Just then a frail looking old lady crossed her path and she stepped back to give way only to feel someone’s foot beneath her heel. Kokoro’s blue eyes went wide with mortification and then winced.

“Careful sweetheart, my new desk claimed first dibs on that toe.”

_His voice_ , she’d recognize it anywhere, though it was deeper now, the voice of a man, not a boy.

“Mitsuru!” She gasped softly as she turned and lifted her face to the brilliance of his emerald green eyes.

“Hey you.” He greeted with a wink. 

“When did you get back? I thought you said you won't be back until next week?” Kokoro said, oh god she couldn't believe how much she'd really missed him until he'd shown up in front of her without warning.

“Grandpa called, said he needed an extra hand with the farm. Needless to say, I got conscripted. ” Mitsuru smiled, the light glinted on the metal beads on his right eyebrow. He’d replaced his old hoops with barbells, and she wondered if he had more piercings done. 

He was wearing jeans that hugged his thighs and a black tee with white chaotic patterns, as rebellious as his dark, spiky hair. His tribal tattoos flowed from his left forearm in bold fluid lines and Kokoro stopped herself as she found herself staring.

She was really tempted to run her hand over his skin and trace those ink with her fingertips. He was the very definition of eye candy to her. 

"I got back this morning, left you a message but..."

"Oh!" Kokoro gasped, suddenly remembering. "I forgot my phone at the office last night, had classes this morning so I actually haven't got around getting it back. I would have greeted you first thing if I had known!" 

"No worries Koko Bean." He laughed when she scrunched up her nose at the nickname. The last thing she wanted was for him to see her as a child. She hasn't grown much since he left while he...he's grown taller than she'd expected. Gone was the slender boy with poignant smiles. In his place was this guy who has broader shoulders, well-toned arms, wearing his signature color—black tee over a body that was obviously built and fit. When has he become this heartbreakingly gorgeous? 

“So you alone or with friends?” He asked, breaking the spell.

“Um, I was actually looking for them.”

“Miku?” He asked as he began to scan the area.

“Yeah, she should be with the other girls.” Kokoro murmured, thinking to herself how nice it must be to be tall, she’d bet Mitsuru was never lost in a crowd like she often was or had to ask for assistance when he needed something from a top shelf.

“Found them.” He said suddenly, “Let’s go.” He took her hand and led her through the throng of people.

Kokoro smiled. It felt so much like the old days. So easy to fall back to how they were back then before he left for college.

“I told you she’d get lost.” Miku murmured as the two emerged from the crowd.

“Evening ladies.” Mitsuru greeted them as Kokoro walked behind him.

“Oh, hi Mitsuru! When did you get back?” Ichigo asked as she adjusted the white hairclip on the left side of her face.

“This morning. I brought back some candies, Kokoro can pass them later.” He replied then turned to Kokoro. “So, you free this Saturday?”

“Yeah. Same time?” 

"You bet."  He squeezed her hand gently before releasing it, then nodded his head to the group. “I’ll be on my way then.”

Kokoro’s eyes followed his figure until he sat on the circular booth at the other corner where a few of his friends waited. 

“How come you two never hooked up?” Miku asked suddenly. “And don’t give me the ‘we’re only friends’ crap. I’ve seen how you looked at him, especially when you think no one was looking.”

“You know why.” Kokoro said softly, fidgeting with the straw of her drink. “Besides, I have a boyfriend now.”

Miku opened her mouth to say something but was interrupted when Ichigo waved her hand to catch someone’s attention.

“Hey girls.” Their pink haired friend greeted as Zero Two joined them on the circular booth. “Crazy evening huh?”

She sat beside Kokoro and tilted her head inquiringly. “How’s the tat?”

Kokoro pulled the collar of her peach-colored tee and showed it to her. “It has healed nicely, the ink looks perfect. Thanks again, Zero Two.” 

“I don’t get it.” Miku said as she looked at the tiny heart tattoo on Kokoro’s neck. “Why ink something that’s barely there, unless I squint my eyes looking for it? I thought tattoos are meant to be works of art?” 

“That’s true.” Zero Two smiled as she scooped some sugary concoction she’d drowned with honey. “Some tattoos are meant to be admired from afar, for a wide audience. Kokoro wanted only her special someone to see hers.” 

She nearly choked on her sundae after hearing Zero Two’s words. When her friend suggested the idea to her, Kokoro had liked it. She’d chosen tiny pink hearts that could blend in with her skin tone, practically invisible unless someone was looking for them. This meant Kokoro could hide them and wouldn’t outrage her ultra-conservative family, but at the same time give in to her rebellious streak.

Had she unconsciously chosen the tiny hearts because what Zero Two said was true? That she wanted only her special someone to notice them? But it wasn’t her boyfriend’s brown eyes she first thought of, but of intense green eyes that never failed to light an emotional response within her. An instinctive reaction she quickly shied away from.

“I expected you to have more tattoos than the one on your wrist though.” Ichigo, their short-haired friend, chimed in. “I mean, being a tattoo artist and all.” 

"Don't forget the red eyeliner she got done." Miku interrupted, "Seriously, only you can pull that off, I imagine doing the same and it'd clash with my hair!"  

"We can try a different shade if you want." Zero Two smirked then glanced at the elegant, abstract bird tattoo on her left wrist and shrugged. “Believe me, I have lots of ideas churning in my head. But I have clients lined up, there’s barely any time left to ink myself.” 

“Thank you for squeezing me in between tight schedule, Zero Two. I didn’t realize when I walked in the parlor that people had to book an appointment to have you work on them.” Kokoro said.

“Ah, don’t worry about it. Besides, it was your birthday and once you figured out where you wanted your tattoos, it was really quick.” Zero Two waved her hand. “But piercings like this tho...” She touched the two vertical barbells on her left eyebrow. “Easier done than ink, I can do home service for any of you girls.”

“Is it true that some boys have piercings in their...junk?” Ikuno, the quietest one in their group suddenly asked without warning. There was a horrified sound of girls of choking, of trying not to spray out whatever they had in their mouths, except Zero Two who only grinned as if Ikuno merely asked about the weather.

“You got to see it to believe, drop by the tattoo parlor sometimes.” She invited, “I can show you some... _pictures_ , not in person. Gosh, ease up a little.”

“Oh my god. Doesn’t that hurt?” Miku gasped, “Why would they want to do that?”

“It’s not exactly a fashion statement.” Zero Two licked her spoon. “It enhances sex. ‘Got to think about the ladies’ they’d say. Don’t you think that’s considerate of them?” she asked with a straight face, then smirked when the other girls began to blush. “You...you’re all wondering how sex with a pierced guy would be, huh? When a pierced guy knows what he's doing, there’s nothing quite like it, apadravya gets my vote hands down, although a Prince Albert is okay too.” 

“What’s an apa—” Kokoro was about to ask when her best friend butted in.

“Kokoro is wondering what it’s like to have sex at all.” Miku retorted, and suddenly they burst into a fit of giggles. Even Ikuno was smiling.

Clearly mortified, Kokoro’s first reaction was to look at where Mitsuru sat, mouth nearly dropped open. As if sensing her eyes on him, he looked back and gave her a slow wink. She knew he was out of earshot but had to make sure, she smiled shyly then turned back to her friends.

“Could you maybe, um, not announce it in public?” She said as a soft blush slowly crept her cheeks.

“Public? You mean Mitsuru? Aw, damn, she’s blushing. Stop it, Zero Two, you’re embarrassing her in front of her crush.” Miku said. 

“Me? You’re the one who practically megaphoned it. Poor girl just has to hand in her V-card so we’ll stop harassing her about it.” 

“Not with the dude she’s currently dating though.” Miku muttered. 

“What’s wrong with Kenji?” Ichigo asked, “Isn’t he one of the attorneys working in Niwashi and Associates?”

“Is he too old then?” Zero Two asked before Kokoro could reply. 

“He’s twenty-nine.” Kokoro said shyly, then took out her phone and showed them a pic. “And yes, he works for my father.”

“Are you seriously dating him or just testing it out?” Zero Two asked.

“I certainly hope not!” Miku grumbled, making the others smile speculatively. 

“He sounds like a decent guy, why are you so against him?” Ichigo asked. 

“You all will know once you meet him.” Miku simply said. 

“My father approves of him though.” Kokoro said quietly. And why won’t he? Kenji  was a mature, intelligent guy. From an affluent family, polished and cultured, well-dressed, well-mannered. A dedicated worker, drives a nice car, owns his own house, and would make the ideal husband. 

More importantly, her father began to look at her with warm pride for snagging a catch. Kokoro couldn’t remember a time when she’d felt accepted in his presence or worthy of his approval. 

“So you saying, you’re doing this only to please your father?” Ichigo asked.

Kokoro opened her mouth to deny it, but then thought better. She has never been a good liar. “I guess.” 

Her friends looked dismayed but unsurprised. They all knew how she was—avoids conflicts, always put others before herself time and again, has a strong urge to please people, her parents most of all. Even the tattoos she’d chosen, though an act of defiance, was only known by her and her close friends...the latter only because she’d told them. Heck, the hearts were so tiny, only the most discerning eye would notice them. 

“Your father doesn’t approve of me.” Zero Two murmured, “Don’t look so surprised, Kokoro. He hasn’t said a word, but his eyes told me everything. In my line of work, I’ve become quite good at reading people. Your current boyfriend won’t approve of me either.” 

It was true, her father looked down on people to the point of bigotry. He doesn’t approve of her friends except maybe Ikuno who came from a family of doctors, and Ichigo whose family runs one of the most successful conglomerate in the country. 

The few times Kokoro had gone against her father was when she refused to give up her friendship with Zero Two and Mitsuru. He thinks people with tattoos came from broken families, with criminal records and such. And there was no changing his opinion.

“I couldn’t score high enough to pass LSAT.” Kokoro sighed, “I’m not smart enough to be a lawyer, but at least I’m dating one...” Her voice trailed off. It sounded cold, calculating even to her ears. “But I’ll never let him get between our friendship.”

“I wasn’t asking you to pick a side, dear.” Zero Two said with a smile. “But thanks for the sweet words.”

“Is that why you took up paralegal studies in college and work part-time in your father’s firm when you’d rather open up a flower shop?” Ichigo asked. 

Kokoro smiled uncomfortably but did not deny the words.

“Honey, you shouldn’t let them dictate your life so much. I know they’re your parents and all...but sometimes, you’ve got to stand up for what you really want in life or you’ll end up with regrets.” Zero Two said.

Yes, just like how she’d been too timid to show her true feelings for Mitsuru because she knew her father won’t approve. It was one of her biggest regrets in life. 

 


	2. Chapter 2

She may be the last virgin of her graduating class in high school. But even Kokoro wasn’t that naive not to recognize the moaning, and grunting behind the door for what they were. 

Still, a part of her wanted to deny it. Tried to justify it. 

This felt so surreal. Like she was playing a part in a scene of a movie or drama series. Yeah, the one where the clueless girlfriend caught her boyfriend cheating at the office late at night. But hell, if that wasn’t exactly what’s happening right now.

It doesn’t help that she filled the ‘clueless girlfriend’ shoes so well with the wholesome, girl-next-door image. Blue eyed, barely five feet four inches tall, with thick, wavy blonde hair that can’t be tamed unless braided, she’s the poster girl for innocence in the flesh. In other words, the naive, country bumpkin. 

To think she once believed that someone like Kenji was too good to be true—he came from an affluent, old family that produced generations of doctors and lawyers, the epitome of accomplished and successful, coupled with classic good looks. Kenji favored expensive, stylish suits and wore them so well he could rival the best of the models featured on the cover of a men’s magazine. Except this golden boy has feet of clay. Even if he’s the man her father approved of. 

And why wouldn’t he be? Kenji was on his way, being groomed to be one of her father’s junior partners in his law firm. 

Sounds like he’s on the fast track to getting laid tonight as well. 

Humiliation and betrayal were coils of cold fingers around her heart. Betrayal and rejection weren’t new to her. Boys had rejected her for not putting out. Her own father had often made her feel unwated, she sometimes wondered if she was adopted, not related to him by blood. And then he compounded it by cheating on her mother. 

Since she was a small girl, she had always sought his approval, she’d only wanted him to be proud of her, to be accepted. But it took her until after graduating high school to finally realize that whatever she did will never be good enough, and his disapproving glances and rejection of her had followed her to college when she couldn’t enter into law school. 

She’d felt like a disappointment after disappointment. From the moment she was born...no, more like when she was conceived. Her father wanted a son. 

So it had been like a soothing balm to her wounded heart when he began to look at her differently ever since she started dating Kenji. Like, after all these years, she had finally done something right in his eyes for the first time. 

She would hate losing what little approval she had gleaned all these years from her father, of disappointing him again, but after tonight’s discovery, Kenji left her no choice.

Kokoro stood few feet before a large white door, a brass plate with her soon to be ex-boyfriend’s name and the words “Criminal Defense Attorney” elegantly embossed hang on the front. The door wasn’t locked, stood slightly ajar. They both worked in Niwashi & Associates, her father’s law firm, she as a paralegal assistant. It was late, everyone else has gone home hours ago, except Kenji who’d said he had to take an all nighter, working on an important case her father wanted him to handle. 

Except he was not working on the pieces of evidence held against a murder suspect whose wife and two young children had gone missing. Instead, it sounded like Kenji was working on someone else. His personal assistant, for example.

“ Fuck Kenji! You’re licking me so slowly I’m about to lose my damn mind! Oh god, right  _ there! _ ” 

 _Turn away, Kokoro. You don’t have to see this._ A voice inside her warned. _Just turn around, head for the elevators._ __

Instead, she clutched the bodice of her little black dress, and took a few steps closer to the office door they hadn’t bothered to lock, too confident that they’d be alone in the building, or was too caught up in lust to care if anyone walked in.

Kokoro took a deep breath and closed her eyes as she fought for control. Her fingernails bit into the flesh of her palm as her hand hesitated for a moment before the door, already grieving the _could-have-beens_ of another relationship gone down the drain.

She had thought that she’ll be content with a decent man, one who respected her, who will treat her kindly. Nevermind that he doesn’t feed her secret, dirty sexual fantasies or make her heart race. 

She had thought that Kenji was different from the guys she previously dated. That he would be the one who would break her inhibitions on sex. He certainly seemed patient with her, had clearly stated he was willing to wait and not pressure her into anything she wasn’t ready for. 

He’d been so convincing Kokoro felt bad more than ever and had actually made up her mind that she needed to step up her game. That he’s a man with needs and for Kenji she’s going to shove back all her apprehension of sex and intimacy and tonight was supposed to be that night, when she’ll go down on her knees and take their relationship to another level by giving him what he’d been asking her for weeks. 

A blow job, the full course, not the half hearted barely there licking and pretend sucking, but the kind that involved zero inhibition, just messy, wet sucking and thrusting. God, she had even seriously believed she had enough courage to hand over her V Card tonight as well. Kokoro winced. 

Her best friend Miku had warned her about him from the very beginning. But she had convinced herself that Kenji was such a catch worth taking the risk, not to mention the approving smile of her father that day Kenji had shown interest in her. 

Only those who have worked almost all their entire life seeking approval from a parent would understand how much that smile meant. 

“Get on your knees.” Kenji groaned.

Kokoro bit her lip and with a burst of will power gently pushed the door a crack to peer inside his office. Kenji was leaning against the edge of his desk as his assistant knelt on the floor between his legs. 

Kokoro never got along with her, which made this even worse. All those sleazy, almost pitying looks the busty assistant had been shooting her way now finally made sense. 

She wore nothing but that slutty red smile and black heels. She grinned up at him as she tugged his slacks until it pooled around his ankles, and curled her fingers around his raging hard on, and boy was he huge! 

Kokoro felt humiliated and rejected all over again but felt hatred towards herself as well for not looking away. Instead, she watched as the assistant parted her lips and sucked his length into her mouth. Kenji fisted her tousled brown hair as his hips moved so fast that Kokoro couldn’t help but wonder if he was choking her.

She kinda hoped that he choked her until she turned blue. But no, the bitch seemed to like it as she made a purring sound, the vibrations making him throw back his head as a rough moan escaped his mouth. “Fuck, you take it like a whore every time.” He yanked her head back and fisted his cock to furiously tap the head against her bottom lip. “Swallow every drop this time, you hear me?” 

“Mmm-hmm.” She moaned, sliding her lips down his cock again.

Kokoro stood as if transfixed, caught by a myriad of emotions that baffled her. She was definitely angry, and felt terribly betrayed. But she also hesitantly acknowledged that fascination was part of that unholy riot of emotions. Fascination and curiousity. 

What would it be like to have a man at her mercy like that? To know she’s giving him pleasure and control over his orgasm? And more importantly, do it without shame or inhibition, able to meet his eyes as she did it? But it wasn’t Kenji’s face that her mind eye was looking at, but of emerald green eyes as intense and devastating as wildfire, of dark brown hair soft between her fingers in their natural state instead of styled in spikes.

She should be raging mad at her boyfriend, should have barged in at the first sound of their moaning and grunting and scratched the eyes off his assistant. But she didn’t do any of those. 

Instead, she stood there and watched and observed how a confident girl gave head, and do it with enjoyment. That isn’t to say she wasn’t wounded by his betrayal, because it stung her like hell. But at the very core of her soul, she was more curious than hurt. 

Confused by her conflicting emotions, Kokoro gently laid down the bottle of wine she’d had thought to share with him this night. 

The reminder of how this could have ended differently made her feelings of shame, of hurt, resurface. Ashamed and humiliated that she couldn’t be woman enough to meet the needs of her boyfriend. Hurt that he didn’t respect and give her a bit more time. 

She had been working on her courage to take the next step in their intimacy level, it could have been her on her knees before him in his office right now, she could have given him what he wanted. Somehow that didn’t sound right, deep down she knew her decision had something to do with Mitsuru’s reappearance in town...but she didn’t want to face that right now.

Eventually, Kokoro knew that after the shock and hurt faded, she’ll be really glad she didn’t get on her knees for him.

He doesn’t deserve it. This asshole doesn’t deserve anything from her least of all another breath wasted on him. 

Kokoro silently whirled around and headed for the elevators. Despite what she had told herself, that Kenji was worse than the scum she walked on, that she was actually lucky she’d seen him for who he truly was before things progressed even further didn’t change the burning pain of humiliation and rejection. 

Tears finally began to fall down her cheeks and she allowed them carry away a bit of the hurt, the shame as she pressed the button on the elevator. She’d composed herself by the time the door opened at the ground floor.

No, she won’t shed any more tears for that scumbag. He’s simply not worth it.

-o-

The apartment was empty when she got back, but she expected it. Miku was out on a date, it was Friday night after all.

But the feisty redhead wasn’t the one she had in mind when she pulled out her phone. 

He answered on the fourth ring. “Hey, sweetheart.”

Kokoro heard the blast of rock music in the background, then loud male laughter. “Am I disturbing anything?”

“Nah, you know you can call me anytime. So what’s up?”

“Nothing...I...” Her voice faltered. Just what will she tell him? That she caught her boyfriend cheating? Suddenly, Kokoro felt stupid for running to him with her bruised ego, but ever since they were small kids, she had always been most at ease with Mitsuru. He was always the one she turned to when she needed comfort.

“That doesn’t sound like nothing.” 

Yeah, he knew her too well not to pick up the nuances in her voice. That’s how long they’ve known each other.

“I just...don’t want to be alone right now.” She said in a rush before she could second guess herself.

There was a slight pause on the other end. “Where are you? I’ll pick you up.”

“Apartment.”

“Be there in twenty.” The call disconnected before she could decline or accept.

-o-

Mitsuru slipped the phone on his back pocket then stepped in front of the flatscreen.

“Dammit, Mitsuru! Outta the way! I almost got the bastard!” His three friends, two of whom had been freeloading in his place for the past few days tried to look past his shoulders to the boss battle they were trying to clear.

“Okay, party is over. I want you boys gone when I get back.” Mitsuru said without preamble as he picked up the keys from the table. “And you better clean up your mess or you’ll never set foot inside again.” 

His friends grumbled. “Can’t we stay for one more night?”

“Not negotiable.”

“You’re throwing us out over a girl, aren’t you?” One of them ribbed, but they had started tidying up the living room...as best as they could that is. Mitsuru didn’t mind, as long as he doesn’t trip on their discarded beercans or leftover trash.

“You going to introduce her to us?” The gamer was still playing, button mashing like crazy.

“Dummy, it’s probably only Kokoro. He doesn’t bring other girls to his man cave. Now get your lazy fat ass over here and clean up like the rest of us!” 

“Don’t forget to lock up before you go.” Mitsuru reminded them as he picked up his helmet.

-o-

Her tears had dried up by the time he got to her front door, but he could still see the redness in her eyes. Years of familiarity meant no words were needed between them. He could read her like the back of his hand.

“Ride or movie?” Mitsuru simply asked as he held out a helmet to her. 

“Ride first.” Kokoro said quietly as she slipped it on. She’d changed out of the black dress she wore earlier into a pair of faded jeans and white tee and traded her heels for comfy sneakers. She left a note for her roommate in case she got home late. Miku who shared the apartment with her was also her best friend, but when he’s in town, she gravitated towards Mitsuru more...like tonight.

“I’m so glad you’re here.” Kokoro whispered as she got in behind him on the Harley. Mitsuru looked back at her with an encouraging smile before putting on his night riding glasses. She sighed and laid her cheek against his back as they rode off into the night, heading out of town.

The first time they went for a night ride like this, they were both fourteen. The Harley has been his father’s gift, the last birthday gift he received before Mitsuru lost both parents in a bus accident while they were touring abroad. She rode with him, too afraid to lose him, Kokoro didn’t care where they headed. 

Losing his parents had been hard enough, and an unthinking relative compounded it by saying he should take it like a man. She hated that relative for being so insensitive, but the effect of those careless words only became apparent later. When Kokoro realized the last time she saw Mitsuru cry was that night. 

Even when Mitsuru started to act out in school, unable to cope with the loss of his loving parents, he always made time for her. Kokoro began to worry as he slowly changed, he didn’t smile as often, his attitude became pessimistic, he was suspicious of everyone and everything.

Then he fell in with the wrong crowd. Those days were the worst, he was often accompanied back by an officer back to his grandparents who have flown in from another city and became his legal guardians.

He must have been difficult to deal with, but the grandparents somehow won him over, and managed to pull him through. He may have been a reformed bad boy, but some of that rebellious streak remained alive.

The last time they went out for a ride was the day before he was to leave for college. His father had set up a college fund for him in Strelitzia, a city about a thousand miles away. That’s where his parents originally hailed from.

It devastated her to be apart. Mitsuru had always been her bastion of comfort, of safety, of strength, even when he rebelled against life. He was the first one to know her pain when she found out her father cheated on her mother. Or the recent health care and consequent nervous breakdown her mother had gone through. The distance may have diminished their friendship a bit, but in some ways, things remained the same. 

Kokoro didn’t know how she could have gone through those tough times without him. But she didn’t want to stand in his way to a brighter future, much as it pained her.

And now he’s back. And it was as if they haven’t been apart at all, it was so easy to pick up from where they left off.

As they sped past trees on the quiet, deserted two-lane mountain road, Mitsuru leaned as the path curved and she leaned with him. Once in a while, she’d catch a whiff of his cologne and she’d smile to herself. Woodsy, a hint of citrus. Her favorite scent.

She didn’t care where he was taking them, they could ride off to the ends of the earth and she won’t bat an eyelash. She just wanted to enjoy this momentary freedom of riding the wind. Away from all the suffocating expectations, the disappointments, the weariness of not being good enough.

Eventually, the road ended at the summit which afforded them a view of the glittering lights of their hometown below. 

“Fancy a little hike up there?” Mitsuru asked, pointing to a bike trail that would take them higher up the mountain. There was a full moon that night, illuminating the path. Still, he took out a backpack from the compartment under the seat. He’d come prepared—flashlights, energy bars, and water just enough for a short four-mile hike.

“Okay.” Kokoro said, this wasn’t the first time they’ve hiked at Genista’s Peak, Mitsuru went bouldering near the falls as well before he left for college. But this would be the first night hike she’d done in a while.

They were quiet when they started up the trail, but that’s what she liked most about being with him, neither have to speak a word, yet the silence was never uncomfortable. She loved Miku dearly, but sometimes there were moments when only Mitsuru understood her needs best.

“It’s good to be outside again.” Mitsuru murmured raising his head up to the night sky for a moment and breathed deeply as they slowly walked up the slope. “Strelitzia is a beautiful city, but nothing beats the night sky in its full glory out here.”

“So glad you could finally visit, your grandparents and I have been half afraid you’d never return.” Kokoro admitted.

Mitsuru paused and turned to look at her. “When have I broken a promise to you?”

Kokoro looked up at him and shook her head. “It’s not that, but...after living in the city, you may find our old town boring and bland...”

“Oh, it was flashy and exciting at first.” Mitsuru conceded as they both continued their hike, “But as soon as the excitement wore off and you fall into a mundane pattern of daily living...the hectic pace can be stressful.”

“You had to do three part-time jobs right?” Kokoro asked softly, “The college fund wasn’t enough?”

“It paid for my tuition until I graduate...but for the rest, among other stuff like food and books, I have to work for those. Things are pricey in the city. Around here you can pick apples from your neighbor’s backyard, or pick berries in the woods. Over there? It’s like highway robbery.”

“That bad, huh?” She murmured. 

“Remember that time I had to sleep in a capsule hotel?”

“Yeah, you called them ‘Glorified morgue lockers’. Did you get the internship?” Kokoro laughed softly as she kept in pace with his steps. The place was quiet except for the crickets and occasional night owl and the soft rustle of the wind through the trees.

“Uh-huh, I’m starting this fall. Apparently, I wasn’t the only one who had _that_ experience.” 

“What do you mean?” She asked, glancing at their surroundings. Normally she enjoyed the sights even at night, but reminded of his stay at the capsule hotel, the shadowed trees between rock structures suddenly took on a sinister appearance. 

“I heard that they don’t rent out 606 anymore. Too many guests mistook it for 909 like I did and had the same harrowing experience.” 

“You think 910 was really haunted?” She reached for his hand, suddenly needing his reassuring presence.

“I didn’t stay long enough to find out.” Mitsuru murmured as he laced their fingers, this wasn’t something new, they’ve held hands just like this since they were kids. “But last week when Zorome was around that area, he specifically asked for the capsule I stayed in. They refused to rent it out.”

Kokoro shivered, boy does she love ghost stories, but to be reminded of one while hiking out at night? The words had more thrill to it. “I never experienced such things. I don’t want to, ever!”

“You do know how to ride the Harley back, right?” Mitsuru suddenly asked.

“Yeah, why?” She asked.

“Just checking.” Mitsuru murmured, looking at her with a small smile. “You never know if that thing followed me here and come flying through those trees to finish what it started.”

Now that was just a tad too much. “Mitsuru!” She protested, her mind worked against her, conjuring the image of a floating woman dressed in white, her face obscured by long, black hair that floated as if suspended in water. Hands tipped with long dark claws outstretched to grab them.

“Want to turn back now?” He asked simply, trying not to smile. One hour in, they’ve already passed the three-mile mark. One more mile to go.

Kokoro shook her head, though she was beginning to pant, her muscles were starting to feel worked out. “I want to reach the peak.”

A few minutes away from their destination, Mitsuru still appeared unruffled, which wasn’t a surprise. He goes rock climbing or bouldering on a regular basis, the hike was probably too easy for him, Kokoro thought. But for her, as the air got thinner the higher the altitude, she was beginning to feel the strain. 

He kept her distracted with more stories, this time keeping it light with some cheesy jokes. Though this particular trail was short, with steep slopes on certain parts it wasn’t exactly an easy one.

“Almost there.” He murmured looking ahead. The words brought with it a rush of exhilaration, and relief. His hand kept her steady when she would have faltered on the trail, and Kokoro wondered for the nth time how lucky she was to have a friend like him.

Just then as they climbed up the final slope, the trees cleared out and gave way to a breathtaking sea of stars. Brighter, more brilliant up here than she’d ever seen them in town.

“Thank you for bringing me here.” Kokoro whispered breathlessly as she took in the magnificent view. It had been a while since she’d taken the time to enjoy nature.

“My pleasure.” Mitsuru said quietly as he enjoyed the view with her.

The chirping of the night creatures filled the air, a soft breeze, fresher with the scent of pine and earth cooled her skin. And though it was night, the absence of the sun didn’t diminish the majestic landscape. It was still as breathtaking as the view during the daytime. 

Seeing the glittering lights below that was their hometown, it was impossible not to be humbled by her surroundings which overpowered everything she’d gone through in life, past and present. 

It was a profound feeling, to be reminded that the beautiful things in life were often overlooked, or taken for granted. Lost in the mundane of day to day living.

Mitsuru took out the water bottle from his backpack and twisted the cap. “Here.” 

She took it and gave him an appreciative smile. She wasn’t sure if he’d known she’d need this or it was just a coincidence. But after the physical exertion, came that quiet sense of accomplishment, she could feel the euphoric feeling wash over her now, soothing her bruised self-esteem, her deflated ego. 

The hike up here gave her time to sort out her thoughts, put things into perspective. While the physical exercise provided the outlet she needed to vent her frustration. Now that she felt calmer, her head clearer, Kokoro knew what she wanted to do, how she’d deal with her relationship with Kenji and the inevitable disappointment of her father.

She closed her eyes as she leaned into Mitsuru, drawing her strength from him. She smiled as he wrapped his arm across her shoulders and drew her closer. His simple presence always calmed her, comforted her...but also turned her on. Kokoro bit her lip as she suppressed the old, familiar desire. 

Somehow, she knew that as long as he’s there by her side, she can overcome anything life throws at her, she can’t risk complicating their relationship and ruin it with the burgeoning attraction she thought was long gone. After all, he’s her most important person. 


	3. Chapter 3

Cerasus city was about twenty two miles away from the small town of Mistilteinn, though it meant commuting by train, Kokoro preferred to stay in the small town, surrounded by acres and acres of forests rather than stay with her parents in their stately new mansion in the city.

She had often heard that more people had heart attacks during Mondays than any other day of the week. Like most everyone, she never particularly liked the first day back to work but today was especially awful.

Kenji’s assistant tried to avoid her like the plague, something that was difficult to do as she worked directly with him. Kenji compounded it by trying to corner her at every turn, Kokoro was getting tired of his persistence, and wondered what she has to do to keep him off her hair. 

“No, Kenji I’m not going back to you. Nothing’s going to change my mind, so just drop it already.” She bit out through clenched teeth, forcing herself to keep her voice low.

Times like this, she wished she worked somewhere else other than for her father, then she could just place her resignation letter and walk out.

If Kenji continued this, she likely will. He’s slowly driving her nuts. Ever since Saturday morning when he showed up in her apartment carrying the wine she’d brought him that night. Kenji had been trying to convince her to give their relationship another shot.

She didn’t know how she could have been so blind for so long, she should have seen that someone like Kenji doesn’t feel remorse over his actions, his only regret was that he got caught. He’s worried about his reputation more than her feelings. That grated her nerves even more.

“Come on, Kokoro, I just want to talk.” Kenji murmured.

“Leave me alone so I could do my damn job!” It was getting harder to keep her temper. As if it finally got through his arrogant skull that she’s not receptive to his ‘explanations’, Kenji let out a dramatic sigh and walked back to his office.

Kokoro was filing some folders when her father called her. “Kokoro, can I see you in my office for a moment?”

“Yes sir.” She said as she straightened up, “I’ll just put these away.”

As her father returned to his office, Kokoro wondered if this got something to do with Kenji. News broke out that morning that he got the promotion.

She knew that was the case as Kokoro walked in her father’s office. Kenji and every partner was inside, sitting on black leather, high back chairs. The room screamed of ‘luxury’ with its floor to ceiling windows offering a breathtaking view of the city. Tall rosewood bookcases lined one side of the room, with an executive desk on the other.

They were all holding tumblers filled with what she could assume was bourbon. Her father’s favorite poison. Kokoro felt a bit stifled in the room filled with testosterone, being the sole female. Every partner is unsurprisingly male. Only reason why she was called to join them was the fact that she shared her father’s last name.

Kenji rose from his seat and handed her a drink. Kokoro couldn’t help wrinkling her nose. She didn’t mind alcohol, she just didn’t want to be part of this small celebration of her ex’s promotion.

“Now, Kokoro I know you don’t like to drink, but we got cause for a celebration. I figured you’d want to be here and congratulate Kenji on becoming Niwashi and Associates latest partner.” Her father said in his usual booming voice.

Kokoro said nothing, there was no point. Her father will just cut her off. The urge to splash Kenji’s face with the bourbon was so strong though, she’d actually pictured herself doing it just to wipe that smug smile off the bastard’s face.

She nearly did when Kenji placed his arm across her shoulders before raising his glass. “To new beginnings.” 

Everyone echoed his words. Kokoro walked away beyond Kenji’s reach, but to please her father, she took a sip of the drink. Then waited until they were all busy in some serious conversation before surreptiously placing her glass on the table.

“We’re having a celebratory dinner this Friday night, you’re all naturally invited.” Her father’s big voice easily carried about the others in the room. “Kenji worked hard for this, so I hope you will all attend.”

He trained his eyes on his daughter, and Kokoro stiffened as she saw the reproach in his eyes. “That goes for you too, Kokoro. Kenji should have your support.”

Unable to form a suitable reply, Kokoro glanced at Kenji. So the bastard thought to inform her father about his recent ‘lapse in judgment’ when she had decided to keep him out of it. She wondered how much of it Kenji had twisted to make himself look blameless in all this.

Sensing the eyes of the men present in the room, Kokoro merely nodded her head. The partners didn’t linger much longer, shaking Kenji’s hand before exiting her father’s office until only the three of them remained.

“You did well, son.” The pride in her father’s voice couldn’t be more obvious as he slapped Kenji’s back affectionately. Kokoro had learned to cope with her father’s disapproval, had trained herself not to let it affect her.

But times like this dug up her old scars. Would he have been easier to please if she was born a boy?

“Thank you, sir.” Kenji said with a wide grin still plastered on his face.

Her father turned to her, “Kokoro don’t be rude. Now isn’t the time to let any hiccups in your relationship to get in the way of an important achievement.”

Hiccups? Was that how her father considered Kenji’s betrayal? Just a hiccup? Kokoro gritted her teeth.

Kenji pushed both hands into his pockets, unable to meet her eyes. 

“Congratulations, I know it’s something you’ve always wanted.” Kokoro murmured in a voice devoid of emotion as much as she could muster. It wasn’t hard, she hardly felt anything for him, and just want this to be over with,

“Thank you, it is.” Then he raised his head and looked at her in the eye. 

Kokoro felt dismayed at the realization that Kenji was still not letting go. What more could he want from her? Wasn’t it obvious that her father favored him more than he does his own daughter?

“I need to speak to my father in private.” Kokoro murmured. If she’s to continue working here, some boundaries must be clearly stated.

“Of course.” As Kenji walked by he leaned to brush his lips against her cheek but Kokoro nimbly stepped back.  _ Jerk. _

Kenji obviously wasn’t pleased but all he said was “We’ll talk later.”

_ As if! _

“Was that really necessary?” Her father said in his usual disapproving tone. “Kenji made a mistake and he has full intentions of making it up to you. Why don’t you give him another chance?”

“I caught him cheating with his assistant.” Kokoro said calmly. 

She was indeed calm about the whole thing because despite finding Kenji attractive, witnessing another woman go down on him did nothing to her heart, not even a crack. That she could remain emotionally distant revealed only the simple truth: she didn’t love him. But being in love with him or not got nothing to do with her decision to break up. 

She may be seeking her father’s approval, but self respect isn’t something she’s willing to trade off.

“Someone in your position will never understand the high pressure Kenji has to endure, he’s bound to make mistakes. I’m not defending his actions, but being under constant pressure sometimes impairs a man’s judgment.”

_ Is that what you told mom?  _ Kokoro gritted her teeth to keep the words from spilling. She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

How could her father turn Kenji’s betrayal into her own shortcomings? He will never forgive her for not becoming a lawyer.

“Kenji is a good man, he’s owned up to his mistake and is willing to do anything to make it right. So now, the question is what does he need to do to fix it?”

“It can’t be fixed.” Kokoro said tightly.

“Nonsense, everything can be fixed.” Her father muttered, his tone brooked no argument. Kokoro gave up.

“I should get back to work.” She blinked furiously to control back her tears.

“Don’t forget, this Friday, six in the evening sharp. Kenji will pick you up. It’s a formal event so buy something appropriate.”

Kokoro nodded and rushed out of her father’s office. The party, Kenji, her father...they all feel like a noose tightening around her neck. She needed to get away.

-o-

Mitsuru wasn’t in his place when she called him but at his grandparents’ small farm. “We’re harvesting corn.” He said, simple joy blatant in his voice. “Want to come over?”

“I’ll be right there.”

The six-acre farm situated just outside of town was more a hobby for his grandparents rather than any actual source of income. It has an apple orchard, a berry patch and a small field where they rotated crops between corn, soybean, sometimes oat. 

Mitsuru was waiting for her at the gate. He wore a ragged khaki cargo pants and a shirt that could have been white once. There were streaks of grease on his pants.

“City boy can still drive that thing?” She asked in a small teasing voice as she nodded at the tractor he’d parked at the side.

“Of course, this city boy is still a farm boy at heart.” He winked at her, then helped Kokoro climb up the tractor.

“Grandma said you’ve been helping her with the produce.” 

“Yeah, looks like it’s cornbread and pumpkin pie this year.” Kokoro nodded her head, then glanced out of the window of the tractor, her eyes following the berry patch from a distance. “Blueberries came on thick this season...” She looked back at his profile. “I can still make blueberry muffins like a champ!”

“Yeah?” Mitsuru smiled without looking at her, his eyes focused on the dirt road as he expertly drove the huge machine. 

“Uh-huh.” Kokoro murmured, smiling back at him, the unpleasantness of the day melting away, if only for a moment. “Last year, grandma and I made berry and cream cheese tarts for the festival. We got first place!”

“Yeah, she told me about it.” 

“I still can’t make raspberry jam and jelly as good as hers though.” 

He smiled again and reached out to pinch her nose without warning. 

“Hey!”

“Just keep practicing Koko Bean.” He murmured, then reached out to squeeze her hand gently.

Life always felt simple with him. So uncomplicated. If only it was this easy with her father. 

“What’s the matter?” Mitsuru asked after a period of silence. Quiet times were never uncomfortable between them, but it took only one glance at the defeated droop at the corner of her lips to know something was wrong.

Kokoro shook her head, tried to smile away her troubles, but found she could no longer keep up the pretense. With Mitsuru, there never has been a need to hide.

He pulled over to the side and switched off the engine. “Tell me what’s wrong. Is it that dickhead ?”

She shook her head again and just leaned towards him and laid her cheek against his shoulder. She didn’t care if he was grimy or covered with dust. He smelled of soap, of the sun, of male body, of earth, of fragrant plants...all things that have always soothed her, but right now only served to break the emotional dam wide open.

His arms came automatically around her as she burst into tears. He bent his head and murmured soft, soothing words against her hair as he allowed her to cry her heart out.

“Tell me what your father has done.” He asked when she had calmed down.

She didn’t ask how he knew, they’ve been together for too long for him not to pick up the source of her sorrow.

He muttered a curse so foul it never failed to shock her a little each time as she told him everything. 

“Will you come with me to the party?”

“Why can’t you just say no?” His hand reached up and cupped her chin. “That bastard doesn’t deserve your presence there. I can’t believe your father went through with the promotion after knowing what that dickhead has done.”

“He’s harder to deal with if I don’t do as he says.” Kokoro said in a small voice.

“So you’ll just let him bulldoze you into submission, is that it?” Mitsuru released a heated breath. His eyes told her of his blatant disbelief at the extent she’ll go to avoid more conflict with her father.

“I’ll attend the party, but that’s it. I’ll never go back to Kenji.” Kokoro bit her lip. “Please come with me. I don’t walk to walk in there with him.”

“Oh, sweetheart.” Mitsuru groaned then pressed his lips against her forehead as if soothing a small child. “You can’t let your father run your life forever.”

“It’s just this one night.” Kokoro said, though it sounded weak even to her ears. “Please.”

“Kokoro...”

“I need a friend to help me get through it.” She whispered. 

“Damn.” He groaned, “You do know how to back me into a corner!”

“Thank you, Mitsuru.” She smiled tremulously.

“So what time shall I pick you up?” Mitsuru started the engine and slowly drove off.

“Kenji is supposed to pick me up at six. I already told him I won’t go with him but I want to be out of the apartment early just in case.”

“Alright, five thirty then? I’ll come, but don’t expect me to wear a tie. It will choke me to death.”

That made her laugh a little. Mitsuru never did like being confined in formal clothing. “Did you bring any suits with you or you left them all in Strelitzia City?”

“Honestly, I didn’t come here to mingle with the uppity class, so yeah, no suits.” Mitsuru sighed, “Oh god, I know that look, you’re thinking of dragging me shopping tomorrow aren’t you?”

Her smile widened even more. “I’ll pay for dinner. Say yes, please.”

“Fine...fine. What time do you get off of work?”

“Five.” 

“I’ll pick you up then.” he nodded his head then he switched on the engine and resumed driving.

“Thank you for doing this for me.” Kokoro said softly, then leaned over to brush a kiss against his cheek. “I feel more confident about the party now that I know you’ll be there.”

Mitsuru smiled reluctantly and squeezed her hand, “But seriously Kokoro, you’ve got to stand up to your father someday.”

“I know.” She released a sigh, then perked up as she caught sight of his grandparents sitting beneath a tree, a few tumblers and a jug of what might be lemonade sat on top of the picnic table.

“When grandma heard you were coming over, she sent grandpa back to pick up the peach cobbler at home. Said it was your favorite. Bossy old lady.” He murmured affectionately.

Mitsuru smiled when Kokoro clapped her hands excitedly. “Oh my, haven’t had some in a while, I’m so glad I came!”

“Good thing I left some for you then.” Mitsuru winked at her. Kokoro could only laugh then as he parked the tractor a few distances away, she quickly alighted from the vehicle, didn’t wait for him to help her down and quickly went over to the elderly couple. 

Kentaro Niwashi may be her biological father, but Mitsuru’s grandfather had become an important father figure to her ever since they moved in town to take care of Mitsuru. Her closeness to the elderly couple only grew deeper with time even after their grandson left town for college.

-o-

In the months he’d acted out in his youth, unable to cope with the loss of his parents, only one thing had been constant. Kokoro’s unwavering support for him. 

Counseling didn’t help, he was suspicious of everything and everyone. Mitsuru allowed himself to fall in with the wrong crowd, got into trouble with the law, spent more time in detention than in class, almost got sent to boot camp. He started smoking, drinking...he gave his grandparents hell, didn’t want to bond with them, too afraid of losing them and getting hurt all over again.

And yet through it all, Kokoro stayed. No matter what he did, no matter how low he’d sunk, she didn’t abandon him like the rest of their friends did. It didn’t take long before he was drawing on her inherent sweet nature to soothe the jagged edges inside. 

There’s simply no way to close off his heart to someone who was already inside. She was the soft voice that reminded him of the good things left in life, the gentle touch that cleansed his wounds after a fist fight, the hands that tenderly tended to him when he got sick. 

In time, she helped him to open up again. Helped smoothen his relationship with his grandparents. 

But she was the one thing he could never have. 

Mitsuru first started seeing her differently when she first hit puberty and her firm, blossoming breasts strained against the fabric of a shirt that had become a size too small. He couldn’t count the nights he’d spent tossing in bed, sleepless, just imagining how they’d feel against his hands, what color her nipples were. And afterward, when his body had been temporarily sated, he felt shamed by his carnal thoughts of her, but she was his very first sexual fantasy, the girl he masturbated to.

But just because he had those thoughts of shoving her down the bed and fucking her senseless, didn’t mean he’d act on those baser instincts. Just because he kept seeing her mouth wrapped around his dick, doesn’t mean he’s incapable of genuine friendship. 

It was just harder because Kokoro was simply obscenely beautiful, she became more and more attractive as they grew older, and other boys started to notice too. It doesn’t help that she’s kind and sweet and so eager to please people.

But that was his Kokoro. His sweet, adorable Koko Bean. 

There was no love lost between him and her father. Mitsuru knew exactly what the older man thought of him. Niwashi doesn’t mince words and he had stated in no uncertain terms that he merely tolerated his daughter’s friendship with Mitsuru, but that’s all he’ll ever allow. 

Mitsuru will never be good enough for his only child.

He kept those words to heart. Because much as he loved Kokoro, he knew too well how much her father meant to her, and he had no intention of tearing her apart by making her choose between them.

Perhaps that had been a convenient excuse, or maybe cowardice in his part, or maybe even the foolishness of his youth, but he’d never acted on his true feelings.

He had his share of girls. But he had never encountered that agonizing blend of emotion and physical hunger Kokoro always endeared from him…a searing temptation that he could never surrender to. 

She was his best friend, so he had learned to control those inappropriate thoughts. Had learned to train himself not to see her sexy, sweet appeal. To see her only as a friend. 

Because he would rather be part of her life as a friend, than have none of her at all.

And now, here he is, trying another suit for lord only knows time. So much about preaching to her about standing up against her father, when he couldn’t refuse her anything either.

“What do you think?” Mitsuru asked as he pulled the lapels of the jacket. 

“Yeah, I think charcoal gray looks better with your skin tone.” Kokoro murmured as she sat on the stool. “Don’t worry about the length of the sleeves or the hem, I can fix those. Look for the best shoulder fit, those are harder to adjust.” 

To spare him the agony of selecting the right shirt among myriad choices, Kokoro sorted three and allowed him to make the final selection. By this time, Mitsuru was perfectly happy to let her choose a necktie for him, not relishing the prospect of trying each one until he found one he actually liked.

Then came belt and shoes and dark socks and cufflinks...just how much stuff does a man really need? His patience was beginning to fray. If he had to try on one more leather shoe, he’s going to explode! The only thing good about the coming party was he now had a reason to wear that Rolex watch his grandfather gifted him for his twenty-first birthday.

Mitsuru didn’t mind investing in clothes and accessories, after all, he’s about to graduate and will be job hunting soon. But damn, he didn’t like shopping one bit. It was a mind-numbing experience and he didn’t understand how Kokoro could appear to enjoy it so much.

“Got any plans for tonight?” Kokoro asked as they sat down for dinner in a restaurant. 

“Hmm? None, why?” 

“Well I was thinking on working on your suit tonight, so how about it?” 

Mitsuru nodded. Kokoro said she has to adjust the length of the sleeves and make the waist narrower. He trusted her judgment, she has been sewing clothes since middle school.

Miku wasn’t in the apartment when they arrived, she left a note on the fridge letting Kokoro know that she’d be sleeping over at her boyfriend’s for the night.

Mitsuru sat on the couch and switched on the TV to watch a horror flick. Occasionally Kokoro would come to him to make him try on the suit, fold and tuck the fabric with pins before returning to her sewing machine. She repeated the process until the suit fitted him perfectly. 

His pants were easier to adjust and before long the suit no longer looked bought off the rack but tailored made to fit him.

“Wow, you still got the touch.” Mitsuru murmured as he looked at his reflection on the full-length mirror.

“Yep.” Kokoro beamed, “You’re doing me a huge favor, least I can do is help you with your attire.”

“Do I really have to wear a tie.” Mitsuru muttered, “It’ll be suffocating enough as it is to mingle with those snobs.”

“You can try it for a few hours, if you can’t stand it, just tug it off.” Kokoro said, “Will you stay for the night? I can sleep in Miku’s room.”

“What time is it?” Mitsuru glanced at his watch.

“I’ve been wanting to watch that horror film a long time, but I can’t watch it alone. Miku is even more of a wuss than I am.”

“You’re such a scaredy cat and yet you want to watch such films?” Mitsuru smiled, “Very well, let’s watch it together, but with the lights off!”

“Must we?” Kokoro hesitated. 

“It’s more fun that way.”

Kokoro bit her lip. He looked so attractive with his tousled dark hair and piercing green eyes. And she wanted all the time she could steal. He’d be leaving for Strelitzia City soon enough. What is a bit of torture in exchange for more moments shared with him?

“Not sure what I’m getting myself into...but okay.”

Mitsuru smiled then tapped her nose lightly. “I’ll have some popcorn ready then.” 

 


End file.
